### In which I am thoroughly mocked

Saturday, Kelly was sitting at the table working a math problem related to paying some bills. I was on her computer (my own having died earlier in the week), so I offered to bring up the calculator function on it.

"That's OK," she said, "My phone has a calculator."

"Oh, yeah," I said, "It would." Then I added, "My new phone has a calculator, but I'm kind of bummed that it doesn't have a square root function."

"You're disappointed that your phone doesn't have a square root function?!" she asked, incredulously. (Apparently this is not a very credulous thing to say.)

"Well, yeah," I said, defensively, "I was lying in bed the other night thinking about square roots—"

"You were lying in bed thinking about square roots?!" (Apparently this did not help my case.)

So then I had to go back and explain even more to show her that it was perfectly reasonable for me to be lying in bed thinking about square roots. (Cue flashback sequence.)

***

Like Michael Jackson, my laptop unexpectedly met its demise last week. Because of this, I'm shopping for a new laptop, ideally one that's a bit smaller. I saw a good deal on laptops with an 10" monitor, but I wasn't really sure how small of a screen that would be. (As you may or may not know, computer monitors are measured diagonally, so it can be hard to picture the actual dimensions of the monitor without referring to a ruler.)

I was thinking about this in bed and then I thought that maybe it would help if I could compare the size to an 8.5" x 11" sheet of paper. Of course, to do that, I'd need to figure out the diagonal length of such a sheet of paper. I got as far as a^2 + b^2, but then I couldn't figure out the square root in my head.

So I grabbed my phone, which was by my alarm clock, and flipped it open to use the square root function . . . which proved to be sadly nonexistent. (In retrospect, I could have tried squaring different numbers until I got close to the number whose root I wanted, but give me a break, I was half asleep!)

***

So, now that I have explained myself, I'm sure you can see how perfectly reasonable my train of thought was. All the same, I think I'm going to go lift some weights so I don't get my lunch money stolen tomorrow.

## 6 Comments:

i liked how you worked michael jackson in there.

LOL!

Girl, I miss you.

Maria - Thanks! I thought it would be very topical to do so.

Heather - It's be cause I have mad skillz, isn't it? (I miss you, too.)

Just know that the kids who steal you lunch money are just acting out of confused jealousy for you obvious talent in academics, etc.

Are you all done with your Star Trek series, then?

What you don't know, Ginsberg, is that I'm the kid stealing her lunch money. Hulking muscles, you've served me well.

Ginsberg - No, I'm not, but apparently I keep forgetting about it. Thanks for reminding me! (One problem I'm running into is that I'll have a lot more to say about TNG than I will any of the other series, so I'm trying to figure out how I'll structure that.)

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