A Surprise Wedding
He had proposed the wedding through the children. How about a cake? he had suggested. How about new clothes? How about a party that you can each invite three friends to? How about throwing rice and everybody getting to walk down the aisle? How about, exclaimed the children, getting immediately into the spirit, the boys giving away Mommy and the girls giving away Dad? How about champagne? How about as many strawberries as anybody wants to eat, and how about dipping them in chocolate sauce? How about, said the third, mixing the wedding up in his mind with a birthday party, keeping the whole thing a secret from Mommy, and then jumping out and yelling, “Surprise, surprise!”
– Jane Smiley, Moo
[background on the quote: the parents were hippies who never got around to getting married]
What I really want is a surprise wedding. Not an elopement, where the wedding is a surprise to everyone else. I want it to be a surprise to me.
The engagement itself should probably not be a surprise. If it’s awkward enough to say no to a proposal (especially a public one) how much more awkward would it be to say no at a surprise wedding? (And would you wait until the actual vows to do so?)
Also, the fact that the wedding itself is to take place should probably also not be a surprise – if you think it’s hard to find the perfect ring without your lady being any the wiser, try finding the perfect dress and having her fitted without raising any suspicions! That said, why couldn’t the date be a surprise? Sort of like the reverse of a surprise birthday party – instead of knowing it was your birthday (but not knowing there was to be a party), you’d know that the wedding was approaching (but not know the exact date).
I can think of the following advantages to a surprise wedding:
- I don’t have to make any of the plans. (I can’t really give the caterers details about my own surprise wedding, can I?)
- I don’t have to be as nervous/sick/jittery, since I don’t have a specific date on which to pin the nerves(/sickness/jitters).
- Um, OK, I can’t think of any more. But those two are huge, I promise.
Really, I want to marry someone who would actually throw me a surprise wedding. Or at least play along with the idea. ;)