s Thoughts from the Physics Chick: Unattached

Saturday, October 08, 2005


I called home on Sunday and in the middle of everything else my Mom informed me that another of my cousins is getting married. Fantastic. On the plus side: I like this cousin fine (even if I haven't seen her in a while), she's 21 (which is plenty old enough for a Mormon to be married), her Mom likes the guy a lot, and (best of all) I don't have to find an excuse not to attend the reception, because I now live 1500 miles away from Utah Valley. (I took a lot of crap for skipping the last family reception, most of it relayed secondhand through my family members who did attend. However, secondhand crap is still a lot better than an evening of extended family members bugging me to get married or get engaged or get a boyfriend or at least go on a blind date with their neighbor's sister's nephew's cousin who has some trivial thing in common with me. Like, we're both single. And carbon-based.)

Which brings us to the down side: I'm still not married. Yet another family member has managed to dredge up an Eternal Companion, and I am still treading water by my lonesome. You can run the numbers in various ways: only two cousins older than I are not married, six younger cousins are, plus the one that's engaged, plus the one that has a missionary. And the more people bug me to get hitched, the less I want to talk to anyone in my extended family about anything at all, let alone dating and relationships. (My uncle got so sick of being a 35+ single that when he finally did start seeing someone, they were practically engaged before he told anyone about her.)

To be fair, this rant is a bit preemptive, as no one has actually taken the opportunity to give me a hard time. Certainly, my immediate family doesn't really mind – they'd much rather see me single than married for the wrong reasons. But, in case the subject does come up again, I came up with six reasons that someone in my position might not be married. (I originally had five, but that number othered me, so I had to find a sixth. No idea if they’re actually Peircean.)

If I posted them all now, it would make this entry too long, so I’ll post them on successive entries.


At October 09, 2005 9:53 PM, Blogger Tolkien Boy said...

I've graduated from hearing about cousins getting married - now they're having babies. People seem to think I should be having babies, too, despite the obvious anatomical problems associated with that.

At October 09, 2005 10:52 PM, Blogger eleka nahmen said...

And you're still but a young 'un when it comes to marriage by the standards of the normal civilized world.

At October 10, 2005 12:13 PM, Blogger JB said...

I don't think Mormons are the only ones who marry at rediculously young ages, though it does happen a lot in Mormon society.

It is frustrating when everyone seems to want to see you get married just because you're in what they view as "that" stage of life.

And/or because you've been dating someone for over a year... People get married when they're ready to, I just wish other people would learn to back off and realize that not everyone does everything at the same time. Or even close to the same time.

Glad to hear your immediate family has more healthy attitudes toward the subject.

At October 19, 2005 5:29 PM, Blogger Peter said...

A preemptive rant isn't unwarranted. I've actually practiced responses to tactless people who ask why we haven't had children yet. When they ask me those questions I just have a strong urge to inform them how none-of-their-business that subject is. So I like to have a few responses on hand, just in case.


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